It’s All About Dropping In. Deeper Still.

I tore it ALL down. 
Ripped all those PayPal buttons out and blew it up. 
Every thing I’ve created. 

The website that looked so damn pretty and literally JUST got done. It’s barely seen the light of day. 
Every course and freebie I’ve created over the last 9 months of trying to get what I love doing offline into something that works online. 
Every FB Ad and sales funnel, GONE. 

Things that have literally changed my life. 
Journaling Bootcamp, Wild and Free, The Perfect Day. 
Things that have shaped and formed me.
Well, it can all BURN. 

Every single thing is FREE. 
> NO I don’t care if you take it. 
> NO this isn’t some gimmick to turn into a giant sales funnel. 
> Yep, you’ll end up on my newsletter list if you sign up but I could really care less.
Even that’s getting cleared out, along with every FB group I’ve posted into that I don’t even like. 

I knew this was coming. 
Tried to give away one course for free thinking I’d be able to placate the feeling. 
Hired an assistant to do ALL the stuff that I thought I needed. 
But it wasn’t to be. 

Because I dropped in again. 

Someone I know and love talks about dropping into another level. Like it’s not something you have to try and climb to. 
It’s just something that happens when your soul knows and you let go of trying to climb your way there. 

I gave in to the nudge. 
Fell into the whim... 
Gasped a little when I realised there was another level, right there, even though I thought I’d done enough to last me all year already. 
Trusted that my soul knows and my soul people know too. 

So now it’s ALL OR NOTHING. 
Completely FREE or pay the REAL money. 
It’s just how it gets to be at this level. 

Because I knew that this is what I wanted. 
The duality of these two things. 
First, to literally GIVE the courses and tools that have changed me.
To create them whenever I want, however I want. 

Then to give it to the ones who are where I was 15 years ago. 
Sick and broke, messed up and desperately wanting more. 
(And by the way, screw the people who would say I’m not valuing my work. I know it’s worth. But I know the worth of following the nudge more.)

Then two, the leading that says, now I get to go properly up close and personal with the group of women who are meant to be with me. Only them. 
Me having the mind space to do it because I’m not thinking about all the other stuff. Just giving myself fully to this business of transformation. 
Bringing everything I know to the table. 

I can struggle to put together in a nice tidy package who I am or what I do, but these women don’t care. 
They prefer it multifaceted because that’s who they are. It’s always been about the spirit of it first. 

They don’t need me to hold their hands. They want hard and fast sessions on ALL the things then we don’t talk for a week and everything’s still ok. 
They’re not regular and they don’t want me to be either, thank goodness!. 
But what they want, and what they get, is a laser sharp flurry of ideas. 
A push to be bigger. 
A sounding board for the dreams. 
Courage to talk about the things that really matter. 
A scalpel to the heart, a question to their bravado and faith to their doubt. 

So, everything else is burning. 
No doubt it will be a fire that keeps some people warm and I’m genuinely glad it can help them. 
But meanwhile I’ll be over here gathering my soul people.  
Calling out to them then laughing when we realise we reminisce about the same things. 
How we were always the good girl who wanted more, and then she got it all, then still wanted more. 
How we went from full of bravado to tied up in knots insecure, then back to blurting out something we regretted for a week, to finally saying what we REALLY mean!
How we tried to go to church youth group and do it right but then on the weekend we got blind drunk and found ourselves yelling at the edge of the ocean praying God would show us what we’re born for. Oh gosh.. remember that?!. Tell me it wasn’t just me!. 

Now there’s this feeling that you’re almost half way through life and it's hit you. 
This is it. 
You’re living in the dream and this is what you always wanted yet still…
You're gasping for breath and screaming. 
Everything in you is screaming
MOVE! More. Next level. NOW!

But it’s NOT about climbing to get somewhere. 
It’s all about dropping in. Deeper still. 
Letting who you are find a home in you. 

I’ve gotta tell ya. It’s beautiful here. This dropping in. 
I love that at this level I get to bring my worlds into one. In wholeness and paradox.
The things I love consulting on. Who I am. What I do best. They can all mix together. 
No client avatars, no brand archetypes, no posts full of fire emojis. 

Oh man, it feels good here. 

P.S - Here it is. Everything I’ve got right now for strategy is here. The raw me and this little P.S.