What Do You Deeply Desire?


You’re allowed to feel the tear of it. The push and pull of normal. It’s a sacred space to be lost and found in growth. 

I see you there, driven one, trying so hard to do all the things and have all the things and be all the things. 
You’ve got it all and still... 

Life’s been throwing you a little bit lately hasn’t it. 
Things popping up you thought were dealt with. 
Oh yeah, you get to go through those things again. 

When you were younger it was ok to drown it in some blue sambuca at Bruno’s bar up the road. 
You didn’t know it would look like this one day. 
Didn’t know how much what you chose in those days would matter. 

Then you got a bit older. Covered it up with that nice girl/ tough girl/ smart girl/ rich girl image you picked and did all the things you were supposed to do. 
Nice job, car, kids. So safe. Well done you. 

And here you are. At a crossroads. 
Staring down the barrel of normal. 

Here you are. Facing it again. 
Would be nice to run away wouldn’t it?
Give in to the feelings. Disappear for a while and pretend life was something other than it is. 

Here you are. Perched on the edge. 
The edge of normal. 

What do you deeply desire?
Really, when you look at who you want to be. 

This is your ONE life. 

What when you look back on it, what will make you feel like you’ve done what you were supposed to do?
What does that version of you that you’re becoming know about THIS feeling, right here and right now? 

Because you always have choices. New opportunities to choose again. 

And those choices, You get to feel them. 
To move through it. 
To be honest about it. 

To work through the paradigms and stories that you’ve told yourself. 
To be vulnerable and open with the truth and trust that in sharing it, you will still know love. 
From others sure, but more importantly from yourself. 

You get to come home to yourself again. 
This will not break you. 
It will bring you back. 

As difficult as it feels to own what’s going on right now it will only shape you. 
Go deep. 
Dig in. 
Grow more. 
BE more. 

Because success is not what’s on the outside alone. 
It’s an INSIDE game. 

Ask yourself this - What are the non negotiable parts of your life? 
The things that must remain. Question everything and come back to your truth. 

And where are the spaces you can stretch out into?
Where can you take the risks, make the changes, BE the person?.

So go do that. 
Your heart will feel like it’s breaking a little, and that is how you know you’ve really lived. 

You felt it. You didn’t push it down or cover it up this time.
You let it crack you open. You faced it and you grew. 

It’s a holy thing to be wild and free.